My best friend Missy C has called me fragile... she says like a ballerina.. which is beautiful. And she loves butterflies so now I feel like one. Which is a beautiful thing to feel.
But then Nickelback's Far Away started playing. And for those of you who know, that's the song ... that's the song I tried to die to. I managed to slip into unconsciousness... blood streaming down the silly little mp3 player. That one and Photographs and Save Me. How predictably sad.
Why? Well because the album means something... speaks to my heart and all that superficial sh*t we say and only sometimes mean. But then everything means something to me. There is no rest from the significance of it all.
I feel far away. I am far away. And I am so fragile the draft from a summer breeze can knock me to the ground. Further even. Past the ground. And that's not so beatiful anymore. Romantic if you're not me.
My mind is escaping into watching myself as I would a leaf in the wind this time of year. I want to stroke it and leave it to be beautiful and colerful and fragile but alive forever. I want to feel like it is life.
I am too fragile and it's breaking my heart into 1000 pieces of flak. Every day. I want it to be an explosion like a star ... millions of glittering starlets shimmering into oblivion. That's how I'd like to go please. That's beautiful fragility.
I wish I were a star in the sky. A pretty one.
And I miss you, all of you. And I don't miss me. I want me to fly away from this body like the leaf and the breeze and the spinning stars.
But then Nickelback's Far Away started playing. And for those of you who know, that's the song ... that's the song I tried to die to. I managed to slip into unconsciousness... blood streaming down the silly little mp3 player. That one and Photographs and Save Me. How predictably sad.
Why? Well because the album means something... speaks to my heart and all that superficial sh*t we say and only sometimes mean. But then everything means something to me. There is no rest from the significance of it all.
I feel far away. I am far away. And I am so fragile the draft from a summer breeze can knock me to the ground. Further even. Past the ground. And that's not so beatiful anymore. Romantic if you're not me.
My mind is escaping into watching myself as I would a leaf in the wind this time of year. I want to stroke it and leave it to be beautiful and colerful and fragile but alive forever. I want to feel like it is life.
I am too fragile and it's breaking my heart into 1000 pieces of flak. Every day. I want it to be an explosion like a star ... millions of glittering starlets shimmering into oblivion. That's how I'd like to go please. That's beautiful fragility.
I wish I were a star in the sky. A pretty one.
And I miss you, all of you. And I don't miss me. I want me to fly away from this body like the leaf and the breeze and the spinning stars.
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